Rumours and Dancing

So now you all know why I have been spending my weekends at the coast and have not been seen dancing in London recently. I have been trying to go out a couple of times during the week, but recently I had injured my leg somehow and haven’t been able to dance for a couple of weeks. My leg is better now so I will be out with a vengeance this week, starting tonight.

Because I haven’t been around lately, I am always being asked, particularly by the Argentines, if there is a man on the scene, as if that is the only reason to stop dancing. I have been asked this many times over the last few years. Sometimes I go on holiday or I am busy at work. In the last year or so I have only been going out on the weekends. I have been hibernating in the winters. As I used to go out nearly five nights a week for around three and a half years, I suppose any change in my habits will get people speculating on my personal life, especially as I have never been seen with anyone.

I am usually asked this question by the men. Perhaps it is because the men might have ulterior motives other than dancing. I have been told by many Latin men that they learn to dance in order to meet women. In saying that, they also learn to become good dancers. Perhaps it is their macho pride. I would always laugh at them and say that even if there were a man on the scene, that wouldn’t stop me from dancing.

A friend of mine hasn’t been dancing for awhile now as she has an injury. People think that she has a man and that is why she is not dancing. I tell them she is not dancing because she has an injury and can’t dance. They looked shocked and tell me that they might contact her. I really don’t understand why they hadn’t already contacted her if they were that concerned about her in the first place.

Women stay away from dancing for many reasons. I am generalising about dancing as this seems to be a thread in the various dance forms that I do, not just Tango. There are times when the women become more accomplished than the men and that leaves the women with few good dancers to dance with. So the women will stay away or try something different for a little while before they go back to dancing again. When they return, everything seems fresh as there may be new people to dance with or the previous dancers have improved. I have spoken to many women who have become disenchanted with the dance scene, particularly here in London. They say they get bored with seeing the same old faces or they are not dancing as much as they used to. The one thing that we all feel is that the dancing will always be there for us whenever we decide to come back to it.

Now that I feel competent with my dancing, I don’t feel the need to go out as often and I can get back to doing other things. After all, dancing did take up a huge part of my social life at one time. I am surprised that I still have friends left. I do have other interests and have recently been enjoying other activities since my redundancy. I have been meeting non-dance people. I had forgotten that there are other things in life to enjoy apart from dance.

Now there is man in my life and I am not to be seen in London on the weekends. I haven’t given up dancing, I just go dancing on different days of the week. I have investigated Tango near where my amor lives and will be trying out new venues and will be meeting new people.

I am involved with a non-dancer who has the potential to be a good dancer (I have tested his moves!), whether of Tango or Ceroc, Salsa, Jive, etc., who knows. Or maybe not, it is up to him. Either way, I am not giving up on dance just because there is a man in my life.

I am taking a break!

A Walk Around Brighton and Eastbourne

Last weekend found me again at the coast. It had been a glorious week and continued on through the weekend.

The last time I was in Brighton the children were small. Their father and I took them down to the Pier and spent the afternoon along the promenade. That is as much as we saw of Brighton, and probably as much as we could cope with at that time with small children in tow.

This time was completely different. My guide grew up in Brighton and I received a running commentary on the area along with some amusing anecdotes. Unfortunately, my camera decided to go on strike on Saturday. Initially it was quite a bummer, but me ever the optimist and it being a glorious day, I decided that fate just wanted me to relax and enjoy being in the moment. Brighton will still be there and I can come back another time.

As I didn’t have an opportunity to take photographs, I will refrain from commenting on the architecture, of which there is a wide variety of styles and colours. I will say that I did find it all interesting.

We wandered around through the famous Lanes to look at the many unusual shops, restaurants, cafes and tattoo parlours. We eventually made our way through the crowds to walk along the seafront. As it was a very sunny day, there were many people out with their children sitting on the beach and enjoying the sunshine.

My guide took me to a lovely seafood restaurant that looked out toward the promenade and the sea and had a late lunch. The place was packed, which is always a good sign. It was wonderful to eat, drink, have lovely conversation and watch the world go by.

As with all good things, lunch came to an end and we wandered back to the car via a different route, this time through the main shopping precinct. Brighton is a very busy, bustling town and seems to have all the main high street shops as anywhere else, as well as a few cultural amenities. As and when I visit Brighton in the future, I will let you know what is going on. I was quite interested in visiting Brighton for the fact that they do have Argentine Tango there!

I have been spending the last few weekends in Eastbourne. Compared to Brighton, Eastbourne has a quiet, genteel charm. The town is relatively small in comparison, is very clean, slightly shabby with Victorian architecture mixed in with some of a more contemporary design. The seafront is extremely well maintained with some very beautiful buildings on the main coast road. The beach has a blue flag. You can walk along the lovely seafront all the way towards Beachy Head. I haven’t been that adventurous yet. There is plenty of time for that.

After having had a wonderful champagne brunch to celebrate Mother’s Day, we went for a walk down to the seafront and to do a little exploring. We also managed to get my camera working! I was really pleased as this was the first time I was able to take photos of Eastbourne and the weather continued to be gloriously sunny.

We didn’t really go very far beyond the seafront. It was so beautiful and the tide had gone out a bit. We wandered onto the beach and I took some photos. I just loved the way the water made patterns in the sand.

Before we headed back home, and as a special treat, we went to Favo’Loso for some fantastic ice cream and coffee. This place is a combination of a cafeteria, ice cream parlour and diner. It was packed full of families out with the kids. Some people might find that quite daunting, but I found it rather nice. My children may be grown up now, and although I prefer to have my evening meals child free, I still find it pleasant to see families out together as long as the children are relatively well behaved.

I found an article from The Independent about Eastbourne that you can read here, and which will give you a flavour of this lovely seaside town.

You can also learn more here and here.

If you would like to see some more photos, here is the link to my web album or you can view the slideshow on my sidebar.

The Universe is Toying with Me

I had gotten over my trust issues with The Universe. I have been using The Sedona Method, EFT and deep breathing. I have had positive reinforcement from my friends that have buoyed me up. I am actually feeling the trust. Trust is oozing out of my pores. My new catchphrase when I am being asked about work is that it is imminent or forthcoming. When or where, I haven’t a clue, but I can feel it in my bones. Something good is coming my way.

I spoke to a friend yesterday to see how she was doing. Things are looking up for her too. I told her that I had a mini crisis and that I am trying to trust what The Universe is telling me. I told her that obviously this lull is telling me something and I am trying to work out what it was. Then she asked me, ‘Do you know how to listen, do you know how to read the signs?’ Good questions.

She knows I am Action Woman and not good at sitting still. I get my ah-ha moments while having a shower, working in the garden, or going for a walk in the park. I don’t do sit-down meditation. Sometimes if I Reiki myself it can work, but I usually fall asleep. I need to read the signs. So I put it out there to The Universe. What are the signs and how do I read them? What am I supposed to be doing with my life?

I already had the best job in the world when I was looking after my children. I was my own boss. I worked from home. I could play outside when the weather was nice. I made lots of friends. I was on flexi time. The returns on my investment are now paying off. I haven’t been made redundant from this position, but I am now only working as a Consultant. It is a lifetime position.

I have also worked for others. I have enjoyed the jobs I have had, and I take pride in my work. There have been some laughs and fun times. I have made some good friends. My time has not been really my own. Unfortunately, there are no days off to play in the park unless it is booked well in advance and then there is no guarantee that the sun will be shining that day. For me, working in an office is like being caged up. I could tolerate it, but I would rather be outside. The joy for me came upon my release at the end of each day. I was free to go and have fun, to dance, to be with friends.

A part of me has been really enjoying this down time of not working, but it really isn’t giving me an income. I like to work and I like to keep busy and I like to earn money. I am good at what I do. Sometimes I am offered challenges that utilise my brain cells, but most of the time I can work on ‘Autopilot’. It doesn’t take much brain power to do the filing, answer the telephone, type letters, send e-mails, etc. Sometimes I even do all of that at the same time! I have been doing it for years. It is what we call a no-brainer.

I got a call late yesterday afternoon to temp for three weeks at an Architect’s. When I asked for more information, the woman told me it was to assist the Architects on their projects with typing, etc. She told me it wasn’t brain surgery. It wasn’t brain surgery. Now that takes a lot of skill. So, you would think that with all of the secretarial jobs available out there, I would have had more interviews. I have all the skills, and yet I don’t have the right skills. The thing is no one can tell me what I need to do. I apply to hundreds of jobs, and to only the ones that I know I am capable of doing. Yet getting an interview is the most elusive and frustrating element in my life at the moment. I need a foot in the door.

I thank The Universe for sending me this temp job. I am so happy that when I hang up the telephone I shout ‘yes’ and punch the air. I am overjoyed. I finally have a purpose in my life. To go and work for someone else so I can pay my bills and not use up all of my savings. These last two sentences do not sound positive. There has to be better way, but since I don’t know what the way is yet, I will take the one that is offered to me.

I am so excited that I don’t get much sleep. I get up extra early so I am not late. I watch the sun come up to a beautiful day. Everything is going smoothly. I take the train to Monument as I need to register with the agency before I go to the job. I get out of the tube and there is a message on my phone. The job has been cancelled by the client. No need to come in. Ugh! I am already here. I go and register. The agency is very sorry and annoyed. I am very sorry and annoyed, but I let it go. I go for a coffee and call my friend and ask her if she has time to listen to me moan for a few minutes. She does and I do. I feel a lot better for it as I thought I would scream. I thank her and hang up. I owe her one.

I have an appointment at the Job Centre for a review. I go straight to my appointment after my coffee. I am early and look on their computer for some work and print a few things off. I sit upstairs and wait for the woman to see me. She is with a man. They are chatting like old friends and she is very keen to give him advice and help him.

It is my turn. I told her earlier what had happened about the work being cancelled and she seemed very sorry about that. Then she changed. She told me that I must start looking at work that is offered at a much lower salary. I tell her I cannot live on that. She asks me why. I tell her about my house, mortgage, etc. She tells me I should put my house up for Auction. I am dumbfounded. I ask her to explain to me how it works. She does and I tell her I will look into it. I am trying to keep an open mind.

She asks me about pets. I tell her I have a cat. I was wondering if she was going to tell me to get rid of the cat because of the expense, but she asks me if I could take other people’s pets in when they go away. I tell her no, as my cat is very old. He doesn’t even get on with Ed, the cat next door. She asks me about taking in Lodgers. I say no, and explain about my home being a health and safety hazard because of the unfinished work, which is why I have it on the market. She asks me about builders wanting to buy it. I tell her that people have not been buying as the banks have not been lending. Where has this woman been?

Then she asks me the most ridiculous question of all. Can I dumb down my CV? Yes, that’s right. I am not making this up. I ask her how I could possibly do that. I am looking at PA roles, and they need to know everything I have done. I didn’t tell her that they need intelligent people for that. She said that maybe I should not advertise all of my skills when applying for lower paying jobs. I tell her I do not understand how that will help, as when my references are checked my previous employer will tell them everything. I couldn’t believe this woman. I am so frustrated that I am practically in tears. I tell her that I send off my CV every day. I make telephone calls every day. I have been on a few interviews. She tells me that I must look at lower paying jobs or lose my benefit. I tell her ok just to shut her up as I don’t want to argue. Does she not realise that if I get an interview all they will need to do is take one look at me and listen to me to know I am over qualified? One of my Facebook friends said that it is possible to dumb down a CV, but how can you dumb down a person? I just don’t get it. I left there feeling worse than when I went in. I think she decided to hate me as soon as she saw me.

When I left, the sun was still shining and it felt like springtime. I tried to be in the moment and enjoy the sunshine, but all I really wanted was a great big hug and to be told that everything was going to be ok, preferably by a really attractive, tall man. I was feeling small. The sunshine was persistent and I eventually gave in and sat down for a few minutes to enjoy it before catching the bus back home. I decided to pop in to another agency on the off chance they might have some work for me. I am keeping my fingers crossed. At least I left there feeling better than when I went in.

I arrived home feeling exhausted and thought I would give myself some Reiki to calm me down. I dozed off for a few minutes, which is par for the course. In the last 24 hours I have felt like a yo-yo, up and down, good news and bad news. I think The Universe is playing a joke on me. There is supposed to be a reason for everything and I am not getting it. In spite of all this, I still trust The Universe. Ha ha, he has had his fun with me and I haven’t broken. I have been annoyed and flabbergasted, and funnily enough, I still feel that everything is going to be ok.

There is only one thing left to do. I’m going dancing!