Rumours and Dancing

So now you all know why I have been spending my weekends at the coast and have not been seen dancing in London recently. I have been trying to go out a couple of times during the week, but recently I had injured my leg somehow and haven’t been able to dance for a couple of weeks. My leg is better now so I will be out with a vengeance this week, starting tonight.

Because I haven’t been around lately, I am always being asked, particularly by the Argentines, if there is a man on the scene, as if that is the only reason to stop dancing. I have been asked this many times over the last few years. Sometimes I go on holiday or I am busy at work. In the last year or so I have only been going out on the weekends. I have been hibernating in the winters. As I used to go out nearly five nights a week for around three and a half years, I suppose any change in my habits will get people speculating on my personal life, especially as I have never been seen with anyone.

I am usually asked this question by the men. Perhaps it is because the men might have ulterior motives other than dancing. I have been told by many Latin men that they learn to dance in order to meet women. In saying that, they also learn to become good dancers. Perhaps it is their macho pride. I would always laugh at them and say that even if there were a man on the scene, that wouldn’t stop me from dancing.

A friend of mine hasn’t been dancing for awhile now as she has an injury. People think that she has a man and that is why she is not dancing. I tell them she is not dancing because she has an injury and can’t dance. They looked shocked and tell me that they might contact her. I really don’t understand why they hadn’t already contacted her if they were that concerned about her in the first place.

Women stay away from dancing for many reasons. I am generalising about dancing as this seems to be a thread in the various dance forms that I do, not just Tango. There are times when the women become more accomplished than the men and that leaves the women with few good dancers to dance with. So the women will stay away or try something different for a little while before they go back to dancing again. When they return, everything seems fresh as there may be new people to dance with or the previous dancers have improved. I have spoken to many women who have become disenchanted with the dance scene, particularly here in London. They say they get bored with seeing the same old faces or they are not dancing as much as they used to. The one thing that we all feel is that the dancing will always be there for us whenever we decide to come back to it.

Now that I feel competent with my dancing, I don’t feel the need to go out as often and I can get back to doing other things. After all, dancing did take up a huge part of my social life at one time. I am surprised that I still have friends left. I do have other interests and have recently been enjoying other activities since my redundancy. I have been meeting non-dance people. I had forgotten that there are other things in life to enjoy apart from dance.

Now there is man in my life and I am not to be seen in London on the weekends. I haven’t given up dancing, I just go dancing on different days of the week. I have investigated Tango near where my amor lives and will be trying out new venues and will be meeting new people.

I am involved with a non-dancer who has the potential to be a good dancer (I have tested his moves!), whether of Tango or Ceroc, Salsa, Jive, etc., who knows. Or maybe not, it is up to him. Either way, I am not giving up on dance just because there is a man in my life.

I am taking a break!

Update: The State of Affairs

I have had such a busy week and I still feel I am behind with work! Here is a little of what I have been doing. I am not adding any posts for another week as I am taking a break from blogging to deal with house, family and some personal matters. My life is starting to get hectic again.

I have been to a career thingy at the local adult college. It was called ‘Surviving, how to deal with the recession’. I went to a lecture about looking for work and creating a great CV. There were mainly PR and media people there. I think between us, we could have started our own company. Although most of us were savvy about looking for work, the lecturer did give us information to improve our CV, interview techniques and some other information that was very useful. That means I need to tweak my CV again. I am hoping that this will be the last time I need to revise and that something good will come out of it.

I also learned that I could get either a free course or a major reduction on fees by being on Jobseekers, so I am looking into getting a teaching certificate. I need that in order to teach English as a foreign language. It might come in handy.

The research for Lynn’s Bowel Cancer Campaign is coming along nicely. I should have the list ready to hand over next week. I am amazed and pleased at how well that has been going.

I’ve updated my profile on Linked In. They now have an application where you can stream your blogs to it! Who knows where that will lead?

My daughter has come home for a few days before she heads off to America to visit a friend over spring break. I took the night off from dancing in order to stay home and drink, eat spicy food, and watch a film with her. We are going to go to The Vitality Show at Earls Court today. I got comp tickets and thought it would be fun. Besides, I have to be out of the house this afternoon as the estate agent booked a viewing. I’m keeping fingers crossed.

I have been inundated with questions for Ask Arlene on My Tango Blog. I am wondering though if some people aren’t taking liberties with the questions they are asking me. Hmmm! The readership is now between 150-250 on average every day. I am really pleased about this as Tango is my passion and a lot of people have told me that they found the blog really useful. Now I just need to work out how to make money from that!

This weekend will find me in London. I will be dancing. I am not sure how well I will be dancing as I am having a problem with my right calf at the moment. I had a really bad cramp in it last weekend and I may have strained it with one of my dancers on Wednesday. It is quite painful in the morning even though it eases up by the end of the day. If it turns out I can’t dance, I will just have to socialise and enjoy listening to the music for one evening. Good thing nothing can stop me from talking!

Am off again to the coast next week and should have some more photos and news for you.

The Universe is Toying with Me

I had gotten over my trust issues with The Universe. I have been using The Sedona Method, EFT and deep breathing. I have had positive reinforcement from my friends that have buoyed me up. I am actually feeling the trust. Trust is oozing out of my pores. My new catchphrase when I am being asked about work is that it is imminent or forthcoming. When or where, I haven’t a clue, but I can feel it in my bones. Something good is coming my way.

I spoke to a friend yesterday to see how she was doing. Things are looking up for her too. I told her that I had a mini crisis and that I am trying to trust what The Universe is telling me. I told her that obviously this lull is telling me something and I am trying to work out what it was. Then she asked me, ‘Do you know how to listen, do you know how to read the signs?’ Good questions.

She knows I am Action Woman and not good at sitting still. I get my ah-ha moments while having a shower, working in the garden, or going for a walk in the park. I don’t do sit-down meditation. Sometimes if I Reiki myself it can work, but I usually fall asleep. I need to read the signs. So I put it out there to The Universe. What are the signs and how do I read them? What am I supposed to be doing with my life?

I already had the best job in the world when I was looking after my children. I was my own boss. I worked from home. I could play outside when the weather was nice. I made lots of friends. I was on flexi time. The returns on my investment are now paying off. I haven’t been made redundant from this position, but I am now only working as a Consultant. It is a lifetime position.

I have also worked for others. I have enjoyed the jobs I have had, and I take pride in my work. There have been some laughs and fun times. I have made some good friends. My time has not been really my own. Unfortunately, there are no days off to play in the park unless it is booked well in advance and then there is no guarantee that the sun will be shining that day. For me, working in an office is like being caged up. I could tolerate it, but I would rather be outside. The joy for me came upon my release at the end of each day. I was free to go and have fun, to dance, to be with friends.

A part of me has been really enjoying this down time of not working, but it really isn’t giving me an income. I like to work and I like to keep busy and I like to earn money. I am good at what I do. Sometimes I am offered challenges that utilise my brain cells, but most of the time I can work on ‘Autopilot’. It doesn’t take much brain power to do the filing, answer the telephone, type letters, send e-mails, etc. Sometimes I even do all of that at the same time! I have been doing it for years. It is what we call a no-brainer.

I got a call late yesterday afternoon to temp for three weeks at an Architect’s. When I asked for more information, the woman told me it was to assist the Architects on their projects with typing, etc. She told me it wasn’t brain surgery. It wasn’t brain surgery. Now that takes a lot of skill. So, you would think that with all of the secretarial jobs available out there, I would have had more interviews. I have all the skills, and yet I don’t have the right skills. The thing is no one can tell me what I need to do. I apply to hundreds of jobs, and to only the ones that I know I am capable of doing. Yet getting an interview is the most elusive and frustrating element in my life at the moment. I need a foot in the door.

I thank The Universe for sending me this temp job. I am so happy that when I hang up the telephone I shout ‘yes’ and punch the air. I am overjoyed. I finally have a purpose in my life. To go and work for someone else so I can pay my bills and not use up all of my savings. These last two sentences do not sound positive. There has to be better way, but since I don’t know what the way is yet, I will take the one that is offered to me.

I am so excited that I don’t get much sleep. I get up extra early so I am not late. I watch the sun come up to a beautiful day. Everything is going smoothly. I take the train to Monument as I need to register with the agency before I go to the job. I get out of the tube and there is a message on my phone. The job has been cancelled by the client. No need to come in. Ugh! I am already here. I go and register. The agency is very sorry and annoyed. I am very sorry and annoyed, but I let it go. I go for a coffee and call my friend and ask her if she has time to listen to me moan for a few minutes. She does and I do. I feel a lot better for it as I thought I would scream. I thank her and hang up. I owe her one.

I have an appointment at the Job Centre for a review. I go straight to my appointment after my coffee. I am early and look on their computer for some work and print a few things off. I sit upstairs and wait for the woman to see me. She is with a man. They are chatting like old friends and she is very keen to give him advice and help him.

It is my turn. I told her earlier what had happened about the work being cancelled and she seemed very sorry about that. Then she changed. She told me that I must start looking at work that is offered at a much lower salary. I tell her I cannot live on that. She asks me why. I tell her about my house, mortgage, etc. She tells me I should put my house up for Auction. I am dumbfounded. I ask her to explain to me how it works. She does and I tell her I will look into it. I am trying to keep an open mind.

She asks me about pets. I tell her I have a cat. I was wondering if she was going to tell me to get rid of the cat because of the expense, but she asks me if I could take other people’s pets in when they go away. I tell her no, as my cat is very old. He doesn’t even get on with Ed, the cat next door. She asks me about taking in Lodgers. I say no, and explain about my home being a health and safety hazard because of the unfinished work, which is why I have it on the market. She asks me about builders wanting to buy it. I tell her that people have not been buying as the banks have not been lending. Where has this woman been?

Then she asks me the most ridiculous question of all. Can I dumb down my CV? Yes, that’s right. I am not making this up. I ask her how I could possibly do that. I am looking at PA roles, and they need to know everything I have done. I didn’t tell her that they need intelligent people for that. She said that maybe I should not advertise all of my skills when applying for lower paying jobs. I tell her I do not understand how that will help, as when my references are checked my previous employer will tell them everything. I couldn’t believe this woman. I am so frustrated that I am practically in tears. I tell her that I send off my CV every day. I make telephone calls every day. I have been on a few interviews. She tells me that I must look at lower paying jobs or lose my benefit. I tell her ok just to shut her up as I don’t want to argue. Does she not realise that if I get an interview all they will need to do is take one look at me and listen to me to know I am over qualified? One of my Facebook friends said that it is possible to dumb down a CV, but how can you dumb down a person? I just don’t get it. I left there feeling worse than when I went in. I think she decided to hate me as soon as she saw me.

When I left, the sun was still shining and it felt like springtime. I tried to be in the moment and enjoy the sunshine, but all I really wanted was a great big hug and to be told that everything was going to be ok, preferably by a really attractive, tall man. I was feeling small. The sunshine was persistent and I eventually gave in and sat down for a few minutes to enjoy it before catching the bus back home. I decided to pop in to another agency on the off chance they might have some work for me. I am keeping my fingers crossed. At least I left there feeling better than when I went in.

I arrived home feeling exhausted and thought I would give myself some Reiki to calm me down. I dozed off for a few minutes, which is par for the course. In the last 24 hours I have felt like a yo-yo, up and down, good news and bad news. I think The Universe is playing a joke on me. There is supposed to be a reason for everything and I am not getting it. In spite of all this, I still trust The Universe. Ha ha, he has had his fun with me and I haven’t broken. I have been annoyed and flabbergasted, and funnily enough, I still feel that everything is going to be ok.

There is only one thing left to do. I’m going dancing!

Tango y Salsa

With all the hoo-ha about ‘forced crosses’ recently, I decided to find out all about it. So I took myself off to Cesar and Carolina’s classes on Saturday at Wild Court. Now I know what a forced cross is. It was a little strange at first, but nothing sinister. I enjoyed the class and learned something new. If anyone else wants to know what a forced cross is, I suggest that you do the next course on offer as I don’t really feel qualified to explain it. Whether anyone will remember to ever use it will be another story altogether.

While the Tango lessons were taking place downstairs, a group of young people were practicing some dance moves upstairs. After the Tango lesson, I was able to watch them in action for a few minutes and was very impressed by how the young men picked up the girls and flipped them around like baton twirlers. I am constantly amazed by the fearlessness of young people.

It had been awhile since I had taken some classes and found that I was on a roll, so I decided to stick around and try the Salsa classes too. Cesar and Carolina were teaching Salsa – Cali Style. I had never done this before and was really looking forward to learning something different. I was lucky enough to partner with one of the young men I had seen dancing earlier and knew I was in good hands. It took me a little while to get the hang of it as the footwork is pretty fancy and it can get quite fast, but I really enjoyed it. Compared with the Tango classes taken earlier, my body was getting a real workout, and this was only the beginner’s class! I really loved this style of Salsa and made a mental note to come back and try it again, and to bring my dance trainers with me.

The next class on offer was L.A. Style or cross body Salsa and was being taught by Larisa Balogh. Even though I had tried a couple of Salsa classes many years ago, Larisa really was my very first Salsa teacher. I was pleased to note that her teaching style was still friendly, professional and consistent after all these years and I was happy to see her again.

While the Salsa classes were taking place upstairs, there was also a Lambada class being taught downstairs. Imagine that! From 6 – 10pm there is a profusion of Latin dance experiences to choose from. It sort of reminded me of The Loughborough Hotel all those many years ago where I first discovered Tango. It got me reminiscing and feeling nostalgic. We need another venue like that in London, a place where one can dance to any style of Latin music as the mood takes you. When Corrientes had their Christmas party, there was a double booking for Salsa on the same night. I almost couldn’t decide where I wanted to go. I decided on Tango, of course, but I did pop into the Salsa room a few times for a Salsa fix. The people looked so happy there. Did I say that?!!

I met some really nice people and stayed for a few more dances before heading off to The Crypt for the last hour and a half. I hadn’t been dancing all week and I really needed a Tango fix. I had always wanted to try Cesar and Carolina’s Salsa club La Rumba, but Tango was always holding me back - until last Saturday when I took the plunge. I’m glad I did.

Now, what am I going to do next Saturday?